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Doc's Blog

Welcome to Diana 'The Doc' Thomas' official Blog ... A radio interviewer once referred to Diana as being a 'Celebrity Drag Racing Authority & Visionary'... Diana has indeed filled the shoes (or fire boots) as truly being America's foremost 'Celebrity Drag Racing Authority & Visionary'... Diana is known for being somewhat controversial at times... She writes the truth... Diana tells it like it is about drag racing and other topical issues-- You've seen Diana 'The Doc' Thomas on our DVDs, with Bret Kepner on ESPN, and in all the major media... Don't miss your opportunity to read her daily blog right here at DRAG RACING UNDERGROUND... Diana's blog gives you a daily dose of truth and reality with heart... Diana's unique and refreshing perspective is unlike anything else on the drag racing web... We strongly recommend that you bookmark this page now... Be sure you check in daily to experience & enjoy Diana's unique insight, worldly wisdom and perspective...

Today is "FEEDBACK FRIDAY", meaning I deal with emails that my assistant Stephanie and I receive from readers regarding our most recent blogs... Let's get right to your feedback... Yesterday's blog featuring Franky & Felicia's picks for this weekend's NHRA Summit Equipment Nationals sparked lots of responses. Sandy from Niles, IL said, "I admire Felicia for explaining that Tommy Johnson Jr's MAKE-A-WISH Funny Car is not funded by donations made to the foundation, but from a private philanthropist. I also agree with her that Tommy's going to win again in Norwalk!"-- On the other side of the opinion fence, Ben from Centre Hall, PA wrote, "Why does Franky have to make an issue of whether his Top Fuel pick Dom Lagana is a Mets or Yankees fan? What does that have to do with anything? Please get rid of those jerks from Queens ASAP!!"... Wednesday's TALES OF THE PHANTOM RACER serial series resulted in lots of you writing in. Claire from all the way in Kyogle, Australia said, "Could you please make the story more about Sebastian and less about Fred The Wrench?"-- Once again Gary from Wellington, OH wrote in, "I can't believe how Fred and the Heavenly Drag Racing Association counselors time traveled from the Summernationals to the White House!""-- Thanks to all of you Phantom Racer fans who wrote in this week... My blog promoting the upcoming DIGS AT E'TOWN old school & traditional drag racing event at Old Bridge Township Raceway Park (Sunday July 3rd) resulted in Salvatore from Brick, NJ emailing us, "I'll be there for the first DIGS of the season. The Ida Automotive Gasser Challenge is worth the price of admission alone!"... My blog installment providing the results of the Thunder Valley Nationals triggered plenty of comments, Steven from Millerstown, PA said, "Doc made a joke about it, but I seriously think the Summit Pro Stock cars should be required to add weight."... My Father's Day blog featuring a picture of John Force and Courtney sharing some daddy daughter time caused Stacy from Reidsville, NC to write "I love the pic of John Force with his girl on the scooter!"... My blog promoting the upcoming Funny Cars vs. Altereds event at Capitol Raceway in Crofton, MD (Saturday July 16), inspired Danny from Oderton, MD to chime in, "Thanks for the heads up about the race. My gang will be going!"... Thanks to all of you who wrote in with comments. Even though there's no way we have room to print all your emails, we want you to know that all your comments and suggestions are taken into consideration... Keep those emails comin' (by using the "Contact Us" link atop the page), whether you agree or disagree with mine, or any of our substitute guest bloggers' opinions, we're genuinely interested in your feedback... We just ask that you please keep your emails short and to the point, no rambling please, and please also include where you're from, we often find the location of where folks are writing us from to be sort of interesting. If you want to remain anonymous you can do that too (just write that you want to remain anonymous in the body of your email, and we won't disclose your identity in the event we choose to make a reference to your particular opinion)... Thanks...

 

 

It's "FEEDBACK FRIDAY" here at DRAG RACING UNDERGROUND. That means I print excerpts from some of the emails that you readers write in with. I always appreciate you folks who sit down at your keyboard and type me your thoughts and opinions.


FRANKY & FELICIA PICK SUMMIT RACING EQUIPMENT NHRA NATIONALS WINNERS...

Posted by: lovely

Tagged in: Untagged 

Please meet Drag Racing Underground's NHRA race-winner-predicting-duo from Queens, New York. We'd like to introduce Franky & Felicia. They're a couple of sweethearts who have a love for drag racing, and have asked that we give them a shot at making race predictions. They persistently insisted to us that they have what it takes to get the job done. We're continuing to bring them to you now for their second season!! They definitely were not without controversy during their first season!!... Feel free to send us your opinion of them by using the 'Contact Us' link at the top of this page... Without further ado, we proudly present to you Franky & Felicia and their NHRA predictions...


Franky: Yo! Me and my hot little lady are stoked 'bout giving youse our picks for this weekend's Summit Racing Equipment NHRA Nationals happening at Summit Motorsports Park in Norwalk, Ohio. I've never been to Ohio before, but I gots my cousin Billy living there. He and his family came to visit my family in Queens a couple times when we was little kids. Billy always wore a black cowboy hat when we'd play in the house. I liked Billy 'cause he was into drag racing our little miniature Hot Wheels cars on the kitchen floor. And yeah, as most of you have probably already guessed, just like NY Mets General Manager, Sandy Alderman, I've been on an emotional roller coaster following the recent exploits of the team. Anyways, whatever, whatever. Pull up a chair and read what me and Felicia got to say to youse 'bout the NHRA drag racing this weekend!

Felicia: Right on, Franky, you gorgeous hunk of a man! I thoughts you sez you wasn't gonna talk about the New York Mets? I know you promised that you wasn't going to talk about The Mets as much this season, like ya did last season! Drag Racing Underground will be gettin' lots of emails again from all the people complaining about you talkin' 'bout the Mets on this DRAG RACING web page! My Top Fuel pick for Norwalk is Luigi Novelli. I know he's about as much of an underdog as a racer can be among the NHRA field, but so what?!? I can pick him if I wants to. Luigi deserves a crack at going rounds, maybe gettin' a little lucky, and gettin' his hands on a Wally.  Look for Luigi Novelli to get some blessings and breaks in his National Machine Repair dragster, and subsequently go all the way to flatten the fueler field at the Summit race!

Franky: No way is Luigi Novelli gonna win in Ohio. And I don't mean any offense to all the Novelli fans out there in cyberland, but give me a friggin' break, I thinks the chances of him winning is highly unlikely.  I'm going with Dominick Lagana. I admit, that much like Novelli, Dom Lagana is an underdog too. But I gots to see this Scarsdale, New Yawker make an appearance in the winner's circle. I like his style, he kind of reminds me of myself, although I don't thinks I've ever seen Dom wearin' a Mets cap, I'll bet he's a Yankees kind of guy, but whatever, I guess he ain'ts poifect. Lagana's got solid driving chops, and like you say, Felicia, besides me, he's got the most gorgeous smile for a New Yawker. The Lagana team got their digger running quick ETs lately,  and they're gonna dispense some Nitro Ninja whoop ass on the Ohio Top Fuel field!

Felicia: That sounds corny, Franky.  It don't sound like you, using that old tired 'whoop ass' expression?? I thinks maybe you're being coached what to say again by that cockeyed blowhard cousin Enzo of yours from Jersey?!? Gee whiz... I thinks your desire to be like me, and pick an underdog this week is blinding your prognostication skills from making a better prediction this week. I don't see Lagana storming Norwalk. However, if he does win, I'll drive you up to Scarsdale, New Yawk, and buy you them upside down banana cream pancakes that town is so famous for. How's that suit ya?!? My Funny Car pick is for Tommy Johnson Jr. He won at Bristol last week and might be on a wave of momentum. I wants people to know that the MAKE-A-WISH Funny Car he drives is in no way funded by peoples' donations to the MAKE-A-WISH foundation, the car is completely financed by philanthropist Terry Chandler.  I gots a gut feeling about Johnson and his team. I gots that feeling in my belly that he's gonna get the job done, unless of course, that feeling in my belly is from last night's funky onion dip at our Billy Joel Queens NY chapter fan club party??

Franky: Fugget about Tommy Johnson Jr., he's not the racer I see making headlines in Ohio. I respect the guy, but the Summit Racing Equipment Nationals ain't gonna be his race by any stretch of your overactive imagination, my fragrant Felicia.  I'm picking Alexis DeJoria for Funny Car. She's my favorite billionaire broad. I'm still psyched about her win at the Vegas race, the lady does have all the stuff necessary to go rounds, and take home the Wally and the whole freakin' caboose!!--- Her Tequila Partron team are gonna get their groove on. She beat Chad Head and heavyweight Del Worsham at Bristol last weekend, she's in the running for sure. I know I'm going to hear crap from all the playa-haters emailing me, 'cause I'm pickin' Alexis to win. I get called a "fanboy" 'cause of my support for the fast females. But I don't care. I gots thick skin just like my hero Billy Joel. I'm predicting Alexis to make some history this weekend!

Felicia: Ya know, I hates to say dis, Franky, but I just don't thinks Alexis DeJoria is gonna make any history at Norwalk. Sorry 'bout dat... Ya know, I get a lot of flack from many of you readers about me always talkin' 'bout myself, likes I ain't supposed to talk about myself?!? Geeeez, what kinda fun can a gal have if she ain't talkin' 'bout herself?!?  Many of you smarty pants complain about me to management, 'cause you thinks I'm nothin' but a crazy bird from Queens. Whatever... For Bristol I'm gonna pick veteran New Yawk racer Kenny Delco to take Pro Stock . He's also kinda what people would refer to as an underdog, but he has the potential to land a raceday with a break or two, and he's got the performance to activate some win lights with his prime Frank Iaconio built powerplant under da hood. Kenny Delco and his fast JCM Racing '16 Camaro are gonna turn on the heavy, honeybuns!

Franky: I don't agree, sweetcakes. I thinks you're delusional with that Pro Stock pick. I realize that Kenny Delco is one tough doorslammin' guy, but I'm just not feelin' him as hitting a winning note at Norwalk. Once again, just like most of last season, I'll bet all my jollyrocks on Erica Enders. I know that she ain't exactly setting the world on fire so far this season, and she's driving me crazy with her total lack of winning, but she'll get back on her game. When I'm watching NHRA on FOX, I nearly collapse from frustration when she goes out in early rounds.  Her crew has got to finally get things figured out with the new motor changes and technical stuff. And yeah, I can see all the hate mail coming my way now. All the haters who call me a "fanboy" because I still root for Erica, they gets me madder than Billy Joel driving his car through a Long Island pizzeria's window!! Erica's the undisputed queen of the christmas tree. Her reaction times were making the rest of the racers last season look like sleeping, snoring Rip Van Winkles. Erica Enders is a serious racer when she's out on the track, she sort of reminds me of how you get, Felicia, when you're playing Three-Card Monte with the retired geezers down at the borough's senior citizen center. You get that really intense game face of yours going on just like Erica does when she's driving.

 

Felicia: I hopes we did good, honey.

 

Franky: We picked 'em, babe. 'Cause we're a couple of classy winners who know how to pick da winners.

 


Break the conventional chains which bind you to the belief that the only things in this world that exist are those we're able to touch and see in daylight. Ever heard of quantum physics?-- Many credible physicists and scientists from the world's most prestigious of learning institutions now believe that parallel universes exist all around us-- We are likely surrounded by spectacular space, time, energy, and matter anomalies that boggle the brain, proving that what was once thought to be fantasy and fiction, can now be believed as truth and fathomable fact ... We offer you a slice of hard science, combined with sporadic sprinklings of paranormal phenomena, as we here at Drag Racing Underground, proudly present to you... TALES OF THE PHANTOM RACER... Step out of the narrow-minded mist that encircles those who wear their stagnate skepticism like an outdated peach-colored leisure suit, and allow yourself the freedom to follow the adventures of drag racing's infinite and most indestructible spirit... Pull up a chair, toss your inhibitions aside, and ride along with one Sebastian Conrad, strong spirited eternal speed freak extraordinaire.

 

Last week's episode told of how our favorite metaphysical/afterlife drag racing dream team were separated. Leader Larry Lamb teleported Fred The Wrench to get psyche spiritual counseling from the Heavenly Drag Racing Association's special Spiritual Psyche Counselors. Fred was teleported via celestial time-traveling technology to the 2016 running of the Summernationals, to meet with HDRA Spiritual Psyche Counselors, while the rest of the crew remained at home occupying racing operations headquarters... Fred metaphysically materialized to the drag strip. Four female counseling spirits from the HDRA, dressed in semi-provocative, greenish medieval meets Madison Avenue gowns met Fred in the pits. Keep in mind that Fred and the Spiritual Psyche Counselors are completely invisible to the general mortal population at the event, because they exist solely in the spirit realm.. "My name's Angelacias." said the speaking counselor "And to my right is Carinella, to my left is Quadrosenella, and the one who just flew up there, sitting on top of the food stand roof with the flowing purple hair is Babella, she's in charge of security, to make sure no creepy spirits from the darkside show up, and try to hinder your psyche treatment, Fred."..."YEAH," shouts a gum chewing, lip smacking Babella from up on the roof of the food stand  "WORD ON THE DRAG RACING AFTERLIFE STREETS,  IS THAT THE CREEPS FROM THE DARKSIDE REALLY WANT TO GET THEIR MITTS ON YOU, FREDDY BOY!!"

 

A smirk appears on Fred's weathered face, he looks up towards Baballa and shouts  "I LIKES YOUR BRAND OF SPUNK, UH, MAYBE THIS PSYCHE COUNSELING AIN'T GONNA BE SO BAD AFTER ALL?!?"...  Babella replies "DON'T WORRY, YOU BIG LUG, US LADIES ARE GOING TO GET YOU FIXED RIGHT!!!"... "Ahem," Angelacias astutely interjects "Before we start tackling the more serious side of your treatment, Fred, we're going to take a stroll through the pits."... The sounds of race cars storming down the strip echoes in the background... Babella floats down from the food stand roof to the ground, and Fred and the counselor spirits make their way through the pits... "Hey!!" says Fred aloud "There's quite a few chicks here in da pits!!"... "Yes, Fred." replies Angelacias, "A good number of the, ahem, "chicks" as you call them, are actually drivers."... "How 'bout dat!?!" says Fred with a skeptical look on his face, "Back in my day, we had a couple gals racing, like Barbara Hamilton, Paula Murphy and Della Woods, but nothin' likes the numbers I'm seeing here at dis place!!"... "I'd say that drag racing is the most gender balanced of all motorsports in this year of 2016." says a studious sounding Angelacias... Fred blurts "It's tough for me sometimes to be accepting of womens drivin', 'cause back in my mortal days of the 1950s and 60s, we wasn't puttin' many womens into race cars, we was just lettin' the womens pack our lunches in the morning, before us guys would all leave together for the drags, and, uh, we'd leave da dames at home to do the laundry and cleaning chores."... The good-natured HDRA counselors giggle at Fred's blatantly backwards sexist mindset... "EVIL SPIRITS DETECTED!!!" shouts security chief Babella as she frantically flares her nostrils, smelling the surrounding atmosphere  "WINGED STRAW STRUCTURED SPIRITS OF DRAG RACING'S DARKSIDE ARE NOW FLYING TOWARDS US OVER THE HORIZON!!! THOSE CREEPS ARE INTENT AND DETERMINED TO KIDNAP FRED, SO THEY CAN GET HIM TO WRENCH FOR THEIR SINISTER DRAGSTER TEAM!!!"... "YIKES!!!" shouts Fred in panic!!!... 

 

Carinella immediately activates a compact device on her wrist, resulting in Fred and the rest of the counselors to quickly fade from the Summernationals, and then materialize in a large, majestic conference room... "HEY!!" stomps Fred "WE AINT'S AT DA DRAGS ANYMORE?!? DIS LOOKS LIKE SOME KIND OF STUFFY OFFICE OR SUMPTHIN!!!"... "This is a conference room in the White House, in Washington D.C." says Quadrosenella, "Carinella is our appointed time-traveling technician, she 's transferred our spiritual matter to 1953, the Dwight D. Eisenhower administration is occupying these premises, but they can't see or hear us, so, we're good here."... "GOOD HERE?!?" protests Fred "I WANTS TO BE AT THE DRAGS!!!"... Angelacias interjects "Look, Fred, we're sorry, but evidently you were too far at risk of being kidnapped by the sinister Straw Structured Spirits at that Summernationals event, we had to split that scene, for this more, uh, formal and spiritually secure environment."... "I'll tell ya what, Fred!" says Babella as she smacks her chewing gum, "After we put in some time with a serious psyche adjusting session, we'll run some Hemi stockers out on the White House lawn, how's that sound?!?"... "Uh, alright, I guess." pouts a still bummed-out Fred The Wrench..."Look, buddy!" snaps Angelacias "I'm the head administrator of this counseling operation, and we need to get down to brass tacks, Fred. So let's forget about having a good time at the drags for a moment, and work on starting your psyche treatment."... Quadrosenella adds "And before we get started, I want you, Fred, to take the bottle of hooch you're hiding from under your M&H Racemaster cap, and put it in my hand!"... Fred removes his cap and shamefully grasps a small bottle of booze, and puts it into Quadrosenella's hand... Suddenly President Dwight D. Eisenhower and his cabinet step into the conference room, and while they supposedly can't see or hear our drag racing afterlife spirits, one of the staunch looking male cabinet members glances around the room and says "Ya know, I'm not sure why,  but, I'd say that we're not alone in these chambers, Mr. President."... Babella rolls her eyes, smacks her gum, and throws back her head with her hands on her hips and sarcastically says, "Oh, goody, goody, looks like we've got ourselves a possible pesky psychically gifted bureaucratic busybody among these mortals!!"... Fred and all the HDRA lady counselors then look at each other with a tinge of tenseness...

 

 

 Yes, my dear friends, this is the mysterious mind-bending-hereafter rebirth, and puzzling parallel universe relocation of the bewildering being, energy, and entity we call THE PHANTOM RACER... Hmmm... Is there a member of President Dwight D. Eisenhower's cabinet who possesses psychic abilities?!? And will he be able to further detect our drag racing spirits of the afterlife, who are cohabitating the conference room with him and the rest of Eisenhower's staff?? We're sure that Fred's just looking forward to the possibility of running Hemi stockers on the White House lawn when his psyche treatment session is over!! Will Fred be able to get the psyche spiritual treatment he so desperately needs without further difficulties??? Where is this all going?!?!? WHAT'S GOING TO HAPPEN NEXT?!?... What's in store for our drag racing paranormal dream team as they continue to embark on unpredictable drag racing adventures throughout the parallel universes??... Can they all hold it together and successfully champion the powers of good??... Or will they fall victim to evil entities they cannot control???... These are just a few of the mind-twisting questions to be answered in future action-packed episodes of TALES OF THE PHANTOM RACER!!... There's more paranormal mystical and maniacal drag race mayhem coming your way!!... You definitely do not want to miss it...

 

Stay tuned next Wednesday for a new chapter of the serial paranormal drama series we call TALES OF THE PHANTOM RACER... Be sure that YOU follow the story of Sebastian Conrad... Bookmark this page and BE HERE every Wednesday!!... You can read prior episodes of TALES OF THE PHANTOM RACER by simply clicking on the 'DOC'S BLOG' link that's conveniently located atop this page, and then scrolling to her Wednesday blog installments (because this series is published here each and every Wednesday). All characters appearing in this series are fictitious. Any resemblance to real persons, living or dead is purely coincidental. TALES OF THE PHANTOM RACER story and imagery are copyright 2016 DRAG RACING UNDERGROUND.


DIGS AT E'TOWN SERIES DEBUT COMING SOON SUNDAY JULY 3RD!!!...

Posted by: lovely

Tagged in: Untagged 

I'm glad to report the 2016 schedule for Old Bridge Township Raceway Park's "DIGS AT E'TOWN" racing series. For those of you not aware, THE DIGS is Raceway Park's nostalgia and traditional drag racing series that happens at the facility's 1/8th mile strip. It's a nostalgia drag racing scene that's warm and embracing of everybody. It's a nostalgia scene that's not as "full of itself" or as "stuffy" as some of the other nostalgia drag racing scenes we see these days. Women, kids, curious novice nostalgia fans, everyone's warmly welcome. Drag Cars, Gassers, Muscle Cars, Street Freaks, Vintage Motorcycles, etc, thru 1979 make up the machinery you see parked in the pits and storming the strip. Free tech card with paid admission for all pre-1965 Hot Rods, Customs and Domestic Bikes. Helmets and seatbelts required. This season will feature the IDA AUTOMOTIVE GASSER SHOOTOUT (I love the Gassers!!). There's groovy tunes and an eclectic, easy-going social environment. Special thanks to sponsors like Blacey's U-Pick Auto Parts and Auto Sales of Wrightstown, NJ, Vintage Variety Shop of Atlantic Highlands, NJ, and Pep Boys Speed Shop. The first date of the series is coming soon on Sunday July 3rd (please make a note of that!),  the second date of the series is Sunday August 28 for Hot Fun Sunday, and the third date of the series is Sunday October 30 for the Monster Bash event. Adult admission $12, Kids 6-12 $6, Kids 5 and under FREE. Gates Open 9am-4pm. Enter at the airport gate #4. I love this special old school and traditional drag racing series. And I hope that I'll be seeing you there for this exciting 2016 season!! For more information you can visit www.racewaypark.com



Be sure to mark your calendar right now for Sunday July 3rd... It's the season debut of THE DIGS AT E'TOWN!


At the conclusion of this past weekend's NHRA Thunder Valley Nationals in Bristol, Tennessee, here's your winners... Shawn Langdon (pictured below) in his Red Fuel Powered by Schumacher/Sadvik Coromant dragster took Top Fuel, beating teammate Tony Schumacher in the final round... Tommy Johnson Jr. stomped the Funny Car field in his Make-A-Wish Foundation Dodge Charger R/T. Johnson defeated teammate Matt Hagan in the last round of racing. Please keep in mind that none of the funding for the Make-A-Wish racing team comes from Make-A-Wish contributors, the team is funded by an independent source... In Pro Stock it was Jason Line and his crafty Camaro beating his Summit Racing Equipment teammate Greg Anderson in the final. Gee whiz, wouldn't be surprised if the competition starts insisting they throw another 500 pounds on those Summit cars to slow 'em down-- HA!... In Pro Modified local northeast friend Mike Castellana defeated Bob Rahaim in the final pairing... Congrats go out to all the teams who qualified and went rounds at the NHRA Thunder Valley Nationals...

 

Shawn Langdon leaned hard into the tough Thunder Valley Top Fuel field to win the NHRA sanctioned event.


HAPPY FATHER'S DAY TO ALL THE DADS...

Posted by: lovely

Tagged in: Untagged 

Sending out warm Happy Father's Day wishes to all the exceptional dads out there reading this blog installment today... We appreciate all you do to make this a better world for all of us... We admire you for the strength, courage and sacrifices it often takes in order to be a good dad... Enjoy your day, and know that it's not only on Father's Day that we appreciate your efforts, it's every single day of the year... Big thanks to all the dads on this Father's Day 2016...

 

Happy Father's Day wishes go out today to all the spectacular dads from the Drag Racing Underground...

 

 

 


FUNNYS CARS VS. ALTEREDS AND MORE AT NEW CAPITOL RACEWAY JULY 16TH!!...

Posted by: lovely

Tagged in: Untagged 

Below I posted a flyer for a racing event coming up on July 16th, 2016. It's the big FUNNY CARS VS. ALTEREDS competition at New Capitol Raceway in Crofton, Maryland... I've seen several of the teams appearing on this blistering bill in the past, and they're all tough runners who put on an incredible show. The Funny Car side of the field includes Bunny & The Boys, Sweetman Brothers, Time Bomb Vega, Total Insanity, War Path and Danger Zone-- the Altered side of the field features Right To Breath, NY Earth Shaker, Extreme Pursuit, Geroni Racing, Buzz Kill, and the Yellow Bandit... If you like your drag racing with a nostalgia flare, this is definitely an event for you!!... Plus the WARRIORS OUTLAW dastardly doorslammers will hit the strip!!... There will be Junior Dragsters and much more... For additional information visit capitolraceway.net or earthshakingentertainment.com

 

 


Today is "FEEDBACK FRIDAY", meaning I deal with emails that my assistant Stephanie and I receive from readers regarding our most recent blogs... Let's get right to your feedback... Yesterday's blog featuring Franky & Felicia's picks for this weekend's NHRA Thunder Valley Nationals sparked lots of responses. Becky from Wilsonville, OR said, "Felicia is getting good with her predicting power. Successfully picking Capps to win Funny Car two weeks in a row is amazing!"-- On the other side of the opinion fence, Jeff from Gainesville, GA wrote, "Who the hell does Franky think he is? What gives him the authority to say that Top Fuel driver Steve Torrence should wear a Mets cap instead of a Yankees cap? I'm sick of reading his stupid Mets drivel!'... Wednesday's TALES OF THE PHANTOM RACER serial series resulted in lots of you writing in. Imogen from all the way in Edinburgh, UK said, "Maybe instead of calling your feature Tales of the Phantom Racer, you should call it Tales of Fred The Wrench? He seems to be the big star of the show lately!"-- Once again Gary from Wellington, OH wrote in, "I think Fred has a crush on Heavenly Drag Racing Association counselor Babella!""-- Thanks to all of you Phantom Racer fans who wrote in this week... My blog installment proclaiming NHRA SAFETY SAFARI APPRECIATION DAY resulted in Charlie from Gulfport, Fl emailing us, "Thanks to Doc for expressing her gratitude for the job the NHRA Safety Safari does. They definitely deserve the recognition."... The last several days I've dedicated multiple blogs to either promoting the Summernationals, or discussing the Summernationals' race results, this triggered plenty of comments coming in from you folks, here's a few of them, Margaret from Jaruis, OH said, "I agree with Doc that is was an emotional moment when Angelle Sampey won Pro Stock Motorcycle. Even I cried my eyes out."-- Mike from Harrisburg, PA wrote, "I love the pic of Brittany and Courtney Force at the Summernationals. They're my favorite females in the nitro classes."-- Dustin from Belleville, NJ chimed in, "Kudos to Doc for giving a plug to HARDCORE THURSDAYS at the Summernationals. I go every year to watch the Stock and Super Stock action. Doc's blog showed us Sportsman guys that she's hardcore drag racing all the way!"... Thanks to all of you who wrote in with comments. Even though there's no way we have room to print all your emails, we want you to know that all your comments and suggestions are taken into consideration... Keep those emails comin' (by using the "Contact Us" link atop the page), whether you agree or disagree with mine, or any of our substitute guest bloggers' opinions, we're genuinely interested in your feedback... We just ask that you please keep your emails short and to the point, no rambling please, and please also include where you're from, we often find the location of where folks are writing us from to be sort of interesting. If you want to remain anonymous you can do that too (just write that you want to remain anonymous in the body of your email, and we won't disclose your identity in the event we choose to make a reference to your particular opinion)... Thanks...

 

 

It's "FEEDBACK FRIDAY" here at DRAG RACING UNDERGROUND. That means I print excerpts from some of the emails that you readers write in with. I always appreciate you folks who sit down at your keyboard and type me your thoughts and opinions.


FRANKY & FELICIA PICK WINNERS FOR NHRA THUNDER VALLEY NATIONALS...

Posted by: lovely

Tagged in: Untagged 

Please meet Drag Racing Underground's NHRA race-winner-predicting-duo from Queens, New York. We'd like to introduce Franky & Felicia. They're a couple of sweethearts who have a love for drag racing, and have asked that we give them a shot at making race predictions. They persistently insisted to us that they have what it takes to get the job done. We're continuing to bring them to you now for their second season!! They definitely were not without controversy during their first season!!... Feel free to send us your opinion of them by using the 'Contact Us' link at the top of this page... Without further ado, we proudly present to you Franky & Felicia and their NHRA predictions...


Franky: Yo! Me and my hot little lady are stoked 'bout giving youse our picks for this weekend's NHRA Thunder Valley Nationals happening in Bristol, Tennessee.  I've never been to Tennessee before, but I gots my cousin Wayne living there. He and his family came to visit my family in Queens a couple times when we was little kids. Wayne always wore a brown cowboy hat when we'd play in the house. I liked Wayne 'cause he was into the drags too.  And yeah, as most of you have probably already guessed, I've been on an emotional roller coaster following the recent exploits of the NY METS. Anyways, whatever, whatever. Pull up a chair and read what me and Felicia got to say to youse 'bout the NHRA drag racing this weekend!

Felicia: Right on, Franky, you gorgeous hunk of a man! I thoughts you sez you wasn't gonna talk about the New York Mets? I know you promised that you wasn't going to talk about The Mets as much this season, like ya did last season! Drag Racing Underground will be gettin' lots of emails again from all the people complaining about you talkin' 'bout the Mets on this DRAG RACING web page! My Top Fuel pick for Bristol is Steve Torrence. He whipped the E'Town fueler field silly, and he ain't anywheres near done in his pursuit of the 2016 championship. Look for Torrence in the Don Schumacher Racing/Capco Contractors dragster to dominate the fueler field at Raceway Park!

Franky: No way is Steve Torrence gonna win in E'Town. And I don't mean any offense to all the Torrence fans out there in cyberland, but give me a friggin' break, I thinks the chances of him winning two weeks in a row is highly unlikely.  And how come I see all these Drag Racing Underground photos of Steve Torrence from Englishtown, and he's wearin' a friggin' Yankees cap?!? What's up wit dat?!? Somebody needs to give that man a METS CAP!!! I'm going with Brittany Force. The chick has driving chops, and like you say, Felicia, she's got the most gorgeous smile for a blonde chick. Brittany and her team are gonna dispense some Monster Energy whoop ass on the Top Fuel field!

Felicia: That sounds corny, Franky.  It don't sound like you, using that old tired 'whoop ass' expression?? I thinks maybe you're being coached what to say again by that cockeyed blowhard cousin Enzo of yours from Jersey?!? Gee whiz... I thinks your deep admiration for Brittany Force's looks are blinding your prognostication skills from making a better prediction this week. I don't see the blonde tooth fairy scoring at Thunder Valley. However, if she does win, I'll go to the dentist and tell 'im to make my teeth "Brittany white"!! How's that suit ya?!? My Funny Car pick is for Ron Capps, 'cause I picked him to win the New England Nationals two weeks ago, and he did-- Then I picked him to win E'Town last weekend, and he did-- So let's make it three in a row!  Ya know, my successful predicting averages are now far exceeding yours, Franky! I gots a good feeling about Ron Capps and the NAPA bunch. I gots that feeling in my belly that he's gonna get the job done, unless of course, that feeling in my belly is from last night's funky onion dip at our Billy Joel Queens NY chapter fan club party??

Franky: Fugget about Ron Capps, he's not the racer I see making headlines in E'Town. I respect the guy, but Bristol ain't gonna be his race by any stretch of your overactive imagination, my fragrant Felicia. And you don't needs to be bragging 'bouts how your successful prediction skills are currently surpassing mine. I'm picking Alexis DeJoria for Funny Car. She's my favorite billionaire broad. I'm still psyched about her win at the Vegas race, the lady does have all the stuff necessary to go rounds, and take home the Wally and the whole freakin' caboose!!--- Her Tequila Partron team are gonna get their groove on. I know I'm going to hear crap from all the playa-haters emailing me, 'cause I'm pickin' Alexis to win. I get called a "fanboy" 'cause of my support for the fast females. But I don't care. I gots thick skin just like my hero Billy Joel. I'm predicting Alexis to make some history this weekend!

Felicia: Ya know, I hates to say dis, Franky, but I just don't thinks Alexis DeJoria is gonna make any history at Thunder Valley. Sorry 'bout dat... Ya know, I get a lot of flack from many of you readers about me always talkin' 'bout myself, likes I ain't supposed to talk about myself?!? Geeeez, what kinda fun can a gal have if she ain't talkin' 'bout herself?!?  Many of you smarty pants complain about me to management, 'cause you thinks I'm nothin' but a crazy bird from Queens. Whatever... For Bristol I'm gonna pick Greg Anderson to take Pro Stock . He won last week at E'Town, so  let's see him make it two in row "skadooooey", like my traveling salesman uncle would say when he'd get tipsy at our family barbecues. Greg Anderson and his Summit Chevy Camaro are gonna turn on the heavy, honeybuns!

Franky: I don't agree, sweetcakes. I thinks you're delusional with that Pro Stock pick. I realize that Greg Anderson is one tough doorslammin' guy, but I'm just not feelin' him as hitting a winning note at Thunder Valley. Once again, just like most of last season, I'll bet all my jollyrocks on Erica Enders. I know that she ain't exactly setting the world on fire so far this season, and she's driving me crazy with her total lack of winning, but she'll get back on her game. When I'm watching NHRA on FOX, I nearly collapse from frustration when she goes out in early rounds.  I thinks Erica is gonna make a big comeback in Bristol. Her crew will get things figured out with the new motor changes. And yeah, I can see all the hate mail coming my way now. All the haters who call me a "fanboy" because I root for Erica, they gets me madder than Billy Joel driving his car through a Long Island pizzeria's window!! Erica's the undisputed queen of the christmas tree. Her reaction times were making the rest of the racers last season look like sleeping, snoring Rip Van Winkles. Erica Enders is a serious racer when she's out on the track, she sort of reminds me of how you get, Felicia, when you're playing Candyland with the young tots down at the borough's youth recreation center. You get that really intense game face of yours going on just like Erica does when she's driving.

 

Felicia: I hopes we did good, honey.

 

Franky: We picked 'em, babe. 'Cause we're a couple of classy winners who know how to pick da winners.

 


Break the conventional chains which bind you to the belief that the only things in this world that exist are those we're able to touch and see in daylight. Ever heard of quantum physics?-- Many credible physicists and scientists from the world's most prestigious of learning institutions now believe that parallel universes exist all around us-- We are likely surrounded by spectacular space, time, energy, and matter anomalies that boggle the brain, proving that what was once thought to be fantasy and fiction, can now be believed as truth and fathomable fact ... We offer you a slice of hard science, combined with sporadic sprinklings of paranormal phenomena, as we here at Drag Racing Underground, proudly present to you... TALES OF THE PHANTOM RACER... Step out of the narrow-minded mist that encircles those who wear their stagnate skepticism like an outdated peach-colored leisure suit, and allow yourself the freedom to follow the adventures of drag racing's infinite and most indestructible spirit... Pull up a chair, toss your inhibitions aside, and ride along with one Sebastian Conrad, strong spirited eternal speed freak extraordinaire.

 

Last week's episode told of how our favorite metaphysical/afterlife drag racing dream team were separated. After Fred The Wrench's near-tragic fainting spell at the Heavenly Drag Racing Association's ballroom event, and Fred making a disrespectful comment regarding his health and kidnapping scare, that was heroically diverted by Maria, leader Larry Lamb teleported him to get psyche spiritual counseling from the Heavenly Drag Racing Association's special Spiritual Psyche Counselors. Fred's been teleported via celestial time traveling technology to the 2016 running of the Summernationals, to meet with the HDRA's Spiritual Psyche Counselors, while the rest of the crew remain home at racing operations headquarters... Fred's metaphysically materialized next to the track's pitside food stand. Four female spirits from the HDRA then materialized in front of Fred, dressed in semi-provocative, greenish medieval meets Madison Avenue gowns (keep in mind that Fred and the Spiritual Psyche Counselors are completely invisible to the general mortal population at the event because they exist solely in the spirit realm)... "HOLY COW!!!" blurted Fred The Wrench "I WAS EXPECTING GEEKY SPIRIT GUYS IN WHITE LAB COATS WITH BIG RIM GLASSES!!!"... "Sorry to disappoint you, Fred." coyly said one of the counseling spirits... "Uh, no, I aint's disappointed at all, uh, quite da opposite. You womens appear pleasin' to my weary peepers!!" replies Fred... "My name's Angelacias." says the speaking counselor "And to my right is Carinella, to my left is Quadrosenella, and the one who just flew up there, sitting on top of the food stand roof with the flowing purple hair is Babella, she's in charge of security, to make sure no creepy spirits from the darkside show up, and try to hinder your psyche treatment, Fred."...

 

"YEAH," shouts a gum chewing, lip smacking Babella from up on the roof of the food stand  "WORD ON THE DRAG RACING AFTERLIFE STREETS,  IS THAT THE CREEPS FROM THE DARKSIDE REALLY WANT TO GET THEIR MITTS ON YOU, FREDDY BOY!!"... For the first time in a long time, a small smiling smirk appears on Fred's weathered face, he looks up towards the roof and shouts "HEY BABELLA, I LIKES YOUR BRAND OF SPUNK, UH, MAYBE THIS PSYCHE COUNSELING AIN'T GONNA BE SO BAD FOR ME AFTER ALL?!?!"...  "I SURE HOPE SO, FREDDY BOY!!" shouts back Babella "DON'T WORRY, YOU BIG LUG OF A JUG, US LADIES ARE GOING TO GET YOUR PSYCHE AND MENTAL CONDITION FIXED RIGHT-- WE'LL GET YOU BACK ON YOUR GAME AND PREPARED TO BOOGIE!!!!"... "BOOGIE?!?!" replies Fred  "WHAT'S THAT SUPPOSED TO MEAN??!? I AIN'TS EXACTLY WHAT MOST WOULD CONSIDER TO BE A BOOGYING KIND OF GUY!!"... "Ahem," Angelacias astutely interjects "As the director of this HDRA psyche counseling squad, I'll be managing this procedure. Before we start tackling the more serious side of your treatment, Fred, we're gonna take a casual stroll through the pits."... "DAT SOUNDS GOOD TO ME!!" responds Fred "I SURE WANTS TO SEE WHAT'S THEY'RE RUNNIN' HERE!!!"... The sounds of cars storming down the strip echoes in the background... Babella floats down from the food stand roof to the ground, then Fred and the counselor spirits start making their way through the pits... "Hey!!" says Fred aloud "There's quite a few chicks here in da pits!!"... "Yes, Fred." replies Angelacias, "A good number of the, ahem, "chicks" as you call them, are actually drivers."... "How 'bout dat!?!" says Fred with a slightly skeptical look on his face, "Back in my day, we had a couple gals racing, like Barbara Hamilton, Paula Murphy and Della Woods, but nothin' likes the numbers I'm seeing here at dis place!!"...

 

Fred's attention quickly wanders to a confident woman sitting in the cockpit, warming up a nitro dragster. Fred shouts to be heard over the sound of the loud cackling digger "HOLY SMOKES!! THAT BABE LOOKS LIKE SOPHIA LOREN!!!"... The counselors giggle at Fred's outright sexist slant of speech... Babella shouts "YOU'RE ALRIGHT, FRED, WE GET IT, YOU'RE THE WAY YOU ARE 'CAUSE OF THE TIME PERIOD YOU SPENT ON EARTH DURING YOUR MORTAL LIFE!!"... "YOU SURE ARE UNDERSTANDING, BABELLA!!!" shouts back Fred "SO WHO'S DA BROAD IN DAT DIGGER?!?!"... "THAT'S LEAH PRITCHETT!!" shouts Babella "SHE'S ONE OF THE MOST SKILLED DRIVERS OF THE SPORT!!!"... "HEY!!!" exclaims Fred, still shouting to be heard over the loud nitro warm-ups in the pits "WHO'S DAT BLONDE BABE IN DAT OTHER DRAGSTER OVER THERE?!?!"... "THAT'S BRITTANY FORCE!!!" shouts Angelacias "SHE'S DOING EXCEPTIONALLY WELL THIS SEASON!!!"... "REALLY?!? shouts a still somewhat skeptical Fred "AND WHO'S DAT OTHER BLONDE SITTIN' IN DAT CRAZY COLORED FUNNY CAR?!?!"... "THAT'S COURTNEY FORCE!!" shouts Babella "SHE'S NO SLOUCH EITHER, COURTNEY'S A VERY TOUGH COMPETITOR!!!"... The nitro teams complete their warm-ups, and the decibel level returns to a more 'conversation friendly' volume... "There's also women competing in the Sportsman classes, Fred." says a studious sounding Angelacias "I'd say that drag racing is the most gender balanced of all motorsports in this year of 2016."... "Don't cha tell that to my teammate Maria!" snickers Fred "She's always buggin' our boss, Larry, to let her drive a race car!"... "Oh really?? Uh, Isn't Maria the woman who saved you from those sinister Straw Structured Spirits, the ones who were going to kidnap you, Fred?? inquires Angelacias as she raises a brow... "Uh, yeah," replies Fred with a little shame in his muttering delivery "I guess Maria has every right to want to drive, I-I-I'm just kind of a bonehead sometimes I guess"... "Now we're making progress." says a perky Quadrosenella as she makes a note on her clipboard... "You know, being more understanding of women's desires to drive at the drags is a step in the right direction, Fred." adds a compassionate sounding Carinalla... "I know, I know," says Fred as he droops his head in a bit of embarrassment "It's tough for me sometimes, 'cause back in my mortal days of the 1950s and 60s, we wasn't puttin' many womens into race cars, we was just lettin' the womens pack our lunches in the morning, before us guys would all leave together for the drags, and, uh, we'd leave da dames at home to do the laundry and cleaning chores."... The HDRA counselor gals giggle some more at Fred's blatantly backwards sexist mindset... "EVIL SPIRITS DETECTED!!!" shouts security chief Babella as she frantically flares her nostrils and smells the surrounding atmosphere  "WINGED STRAW STRUCTURED SPIRITS OF DRAG RACING'S DARKSIDE ARE NOW FLYING TOWARDS US OVER THE HORIZON!!! THOSE CREEPS ARE STILL INTENT AND DETERMINED TO KIDNAP FRED, SO THEY CAN GET HIM TO WRENCH FOR THEIR SINISTER DRAGSTER TEAM!!!"... "YIKES!!!" shouts Fred in panic!!!... 

 

 Yes, my dear friends, this is the mysterious mind-bending-hereafter rebirth, and puzzling parallel universe relocation of the bewildering being, energy, and entity we call THE PHANTOM RACER... Gee Whiz!!! Fred's supposed to be receiving spiritual psyche treatment with the Heavenly Drag Racing Association's Spiritual Psyche Counselors, but the sinister Straw Structured Spirits from the darkside are already detected, rapidly approaching to kidnap Fred for their evil race team!! Fred The Wrench is a highly in demand tuning talent among the drag racing afterlife!! Does brash Babella, the appointed security chief of this operation, have a strategy to keep Fred safe from the clutches of the sinister Straw Structured Spirits from the darkside?? Will Fred be able to get the psyche spiritual treatment he so desperately needs without further interruption from the evil sector of the drag racing afterlife?!? Where is this all going?!?!? WHAT'S GOING TO HAPPEN NEXT?!?... What's in store for our drag racing paranormal dream team as they continue to embark on unpredictable drag racing adventures throughout the parallel universes??... Can they all hold it together and successfully champion the powers of good??... Or will they fall victim to evil entities they cannot control???... These are just a few of the mind-twisting questions to be answered in future action-packed episodes of TALES OF THE PHANTOM RACER!!... There's more paranormal mystical and maniacal drag race mayhem coming your way!!... You definitely do not want to miss it...

 

Stay tuned next Wednesday for a new chapter of the serial paranormal drama series we call TALES OF THE PHANTOM RACER... Be sure that YOU follow the story of Sebastian Conrad... Bookmark this page and BE HERE every Wednesday!!... You can read prior episodes of TALES OF THE PHANTOM RACER by simply clicking on the 'DOC'S BLOG' link that's conveniently located atop this page, and then scrolling to her Wednesday blog installments (because this series is published here each and every Wednesday). All characters appearing in this series are fictitious. Any resemblance to real persons, living or dead is purely coincidental. TALES OF THE PHANTOM RACER story and imagery are copyright 2016 DRAG RACING UNDERGROUND.


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